Understanding the Cycle of Neglect
“Our children become victims of the heritage left to them by their families and we will continue to see history repeating itself unless they are able to realise that they can make better choices and that they, to a certain extent, have power over their futures. Education and support are key to changing the destructive cycles that, for many, have become the norm.”
So says Lelani Glover, Residential Social Worker at Heatherdale Children’s Home, a child- and youth-care centre based in Athlone, Cape Town, and a fieldwork placement centre for the South African College of Applied Psychology (SACAP).
Why Child Protection Week Matters
31 May to 7 June marks Child Protection Week in South Africa, and a chance to contemplate the plight of our country’s smallest and most vulnerable citizens. According to Glover, the psychological wounds suffered by victims of childhood neglect or abandonment can include
- Feelings of worthlessness, rejection and loss
- Low self-esteem
- Lack of belonging
- Fear of the future and feelings of powerlessness
- Inability to trust adults
Behavioural Traits of Childhood Neglect
- These emotional wounds often show up in different ways:
- Over-compliance or resignation to circumstances
- Defiance or resistance to everyday tasks
- Aggression and difficulty regulating emotions (especially among boys)
- Absconding from school or care facilities
- Testing behaviour toward adults, including attempts to sabotage relationships
- Self-harm, suicidal thoughts, or suicide attempts
- Experimentation with drugs
- Lack of empathy due to never receiving empathy themselves
Treatment and Support at Heatherdale
The treatment options available to the children at Heatherdale include
- Therapeutic intervention (both counselling and play therapy)
- Life skills and virtues programmes
- Victim-empowerment programme
- Childhood rights and responsibilities programme
- Sports, recreation, homework and daily living programmes
The Role of Resilience and Attachment
Whether or not abandoned children or those estranged from parents are scarred for life depends significantly on the child’s own resiliency, the support they are given and whether they have other meaningful attachments, says Glover. “Even just having one adult who believes in them and loves them unconditionally, can make a huge difference.”
Glover adds, however, that they frequently see their children struggling to form meaningful attachments, even later in life. “Also, if they have not dealt with the emotional issues that they have due to their childhood experiences and trauma, they will continue to struggle in certain areas of their lives,” she explains.
Reintegration into Families and Communities
- Identifying host parents when extended family is unavailable
- Facilitating family visits
- Preparing children for independence with life skills and mentoring
- Partnering with organisations to support education, personal development, and community reintegration
Challenges include:
- Families often unable to accommodate children permanently
- Difficulty in families taking responsibility for children’s needs
The Broader Social Issues
“Our children are confronted with so many social issues, from poverty and substance abuse, to violence and HIV/Aids. This has a huge impact on them and, due to, amongst other things, limited community resources, lack of education and a sense of hopelessness, cycles of poverty, violence and abuse repeat themselves through generations,” concludes Glover. “Too many of our children are left without support and forced to make adult decisions, which leaves them vulnerable to further exploitation. There is often such a sense of hopelessness and fear regarding the future that many feel their lives have no purpose.”
How You Can Help
If you’d like to enter the child-care services why not consider taking a counselling course? SACAP offers a Bachelor of Psychology professional degree, approved by the Health Professions Council of South Africa (HPCSA) for the education and training of Registered Counsellors.
